One of the characteristics of the ADHD brain is poor impulse control.
I plead guilty... on so many levels.
It's such a childish characteristic really: the little one who just HAS to get what they're saying said RIGHT NOW. The toddler who must have a cookie absolutely NOW or she.will. FREAK. OUT. In my case when cupcakes such as the one pictures above are in front of me, the sugar addict in me roars to life. I could eat all those cupcakes and still want more. A few years ago I finally accepted that being a sugar addict is just part of who I am. How much of a sugar addict am I? Two years ago, I did a "sugarless month" to test my resolve of being in the presence of sugar while not partaking. More deeply I wanted experience a time free from sugar. With one exception on day 18 I went 30 days with no sugar, no honey, no nothing. Was it difficult? At first ABSOLUTELY. In those first two days, I related to a smoker craving a cigarette. There wasn't a moment when my brain wasn't screaming "satisfy me!!!!." The most interesting observation from this time was that I felt "flat" for most of the month. Most things tasted rather ordinary to me and my moods felt..hmmm....dull. The cravings subsided by day four or five and eventually I even managed to turn down sweets offered to me with little to no trouble, which let's face it had never really happened before. I came away from this experiment with a new appreciation for how much my brain likes sugar and how I will always have to work with these cravings.
Since sweets are my drug of choice, I don't keep them in my home except for rare times such as holidays and celebrations.
The above story is about one aspect of impulse control that's relatively easy to elucidate upon. More difficult are putting blinders on to the myriad distractions that cross my path every moment of every day. Writing these essays is one of the few things that I can do with consistent focus. I put on quiet music and I type away. It find it incredibly satisfying and peaceful.
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